Shakespeare is my Homeboy

"Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? No. A summer’s day is not a bitch."

Tue, 18 Sep 2012 21:21:11 +0100

“Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
No. A summer’s day is not a bitch.”

- New Girl, Series 1, Episode 23 - ‘Backslide’

Yet more of the utterly covetable at the Dolce and Gabbana Milan...

Sun, 12 Aug 2012 20:47:57 +0100

Yet more of the utterly covetable at the Dolce and Gabbana Milan show…

It’s official - I’m in love with Dolce and...

Sun, 12 Aug 2012 20:43:00 +0100

It’s official - I’m in love with Dolce and Gabbana’s Autumn/Winter collection. Tapestry, baroque, and brocade everywhere.

As I said to my boyfriend: “It’s like wearing my favourite literature! So ornate, Renaissancey and lovely!”

His response:

“No.”

Never mind, the high street will be catching-on-and-copying far too slowly to satisfy my “NEED. NOW.” urge anyway.

Oh, and if you recognised that playsuit, Dannii Minogue wore it on the cover of Glamour UK’s September issue this year.

Hubba Hubba.

Self portrait by Elisabeth Louise Vigée Le Brun, 1791. This...

Sun, 12 Aug 2012 18:00:15 +0100

Self portrait by Elisabeth Louise Vigée Le Brun, 1791.

This replica portrait can be found at Ickworth House, Suffolk, UK, while the original sits in the Uffizi in Florence, Italy. If you ever get a chance to see it, do - the details are stunning!

An amusingly stern Narcissus, sculpted in around 1900 by...

Sun, 12 Aug 2012 17:56:08 +0100

An amusingly stern Narcissus, sculpted in around 1900 by Sabatino de Angelis. We found it at Ickworth House in Suffolk, yesterday.

“Now now, stop staring at my tackle…”

Photo

Fri, 10 Aug 2012 18:23:43 +0100

Progress?

Sun, 05 Aug 2012 15:57:20 +0100

I have to say that, overall, I see the culture we live in as an enlightened one. Feminism still has points to enforce, racism and homophobia are still rife in places, and ignorance is something we still have to constantly battle against. But, overall, I’d say that we’ve progressed over time - in terms of equality and simple understanding.

As a result, I was pretty surprised when I contemplated how arguably regressive the media has become in its portrayal of women, certainly in the last ten years. Watching ‘Mel C’s Best Number 1’s of the 00’s’ on 4music today, I’ve been enjoying watching the music videos of ten years ago. My sister remarked that many of the starlets of those days wandered around in jeans and belly tops in their music videos, while today’s singers are decked out in all kinds of weird and wonderful creations. The natural ‘girl next door’ look, to borrow the cliché, definitely seemed preferable to the weird, other-worldly looks Lady Gaga favours today. Now, I’ve got nothing at all against Gaga - I think she’s wonderful. It is interesting, though, that one of the most successful female artists of our day is so notorious because her character, figure, and even her voice are famously and perpetually draped with layer upon layer of artifice. Whether it’s her “antic disposition” (cheers, Hamlet) of apparent madness, her bizarre yet fascinating sartorial choices, or her producers’ use of autotune (not that she needs it), Gaga is never seen or heard in her fully natural state. My question is, does this mean that for a woman to be successful, she must, by necessity, be artificial?

I hear a great outcry from Gaga’s “Little Monsters” coming, but don’t worry, I’m not calling your hero fake. She seems to be, by contrast, a wonderfully open and multifaceted person. Yet, simultaneously, her character, and the success attributed to it, is rarely depicted as something natural. Just like Beyoncé Knowles, another of today’s musical icons, has to become her alter ego “Sasha Fierce” to achieve superstardom on stage, Gaga has to morph into “The Fame Monster” in order to be successful.

We can also address this concept upon examination of the fashion trends popular over the last forty years. In the 70’s and 80’s, women had to dress differently in order to regain dominance of their own bodies and achievements. Shops and runways were full of androgynous suits and “power” shoulders, designed to make women feel not like natural females, who were powerless and subjugated, but like reinforced, successful, “iron ladies”. Yazz’s 1988 music video for “The Only Way is Up” demonstrates this perfectly in the form of Yasmin Evans’ heavily padded jacket and very short, masculine haircut. To be successful at this time was, partly, to emulate a man.

Once a comparative equality had been achieved, however, styles more appreciative of the female form and character began entering into both wardrobes and music videos. The 90’s were all about, as said previously, the “girl next door” look - you only have to watch one B*witched or Britney Spears video to appreciate the sheer love of denim and pigtails enjoyed by 90’s popstars the world over. By the noughties, more skin was on show, and the female form was celebrated in a somewhat more vulgar way - see any video of the era by either Britney Spears or Rihanna for examples! Despite the “noughtie-ness”, the female form was at this time nonetheless still being celebrated, loudly, and clearly, and with absolutely no shame. At this time, indeed, to be successful as a woman was, often, to look like a woman.

Post-2010, however, success for a woman appears to include a kind of mutation, if the depictions in music videos are anything to go by. Lady Gaga’s 2011 ‘Born This Way’ video, despite its messages of equality and acceptance, shows Gaga as a grotesque, alien figure in places. Meanwhile, Beyoncé Knowles’ first outfit in her ‘Run the World (Girls)’ video creates a bizarre hybrid of woman, bird, and metal. Here, to ‘Run the World’, and assert herself, this powerful woman must still mutate into something alien, and strange. In these music videos, the femininity of these superstars is in some ways and in certain elements being repressed, in order to make way, or perhaps make excuses, for their success.

One element of the media’s portrayal of successful females which particularly shocked me today, was found in the comparison between the treatment of one successful girlband in 2002, and another in 2012. While the 2002 video for Atomic Kitten’s cover of ‘The Tide is High’ shows a very pregnant Natasha Hamilton in the centre of every group shot, bump available for all to see as it peeks out from under a bright red t-shirt, it is common knowledge that girl group The Saturdays’ video for their 2012 single ‘30 Days’ was entirely shot from the waist up, so as to actively disguise the pregnancy of Una Healey. This, to me, is yet another example of how attitudes to femininity have changed in the last ten years.

Now, I don’t want to open a can of “if I don’t want to get pregnant/have children, does this make me unfeminine, then?” worms here. So please understand that I am not trying to imply anything of that sort. But, nonetheless, having children is for many women part of the natural essence of their femininity. As in, men can’t do it, and it’s pretty impressive.

Actually, men can do it now, can’t they? Thomas Beatie did it. That American man.

OK, so, clarification: under normal circumstances, men can’t have babies…aaaand now I feel bad for calling Thomas Beatie et al. “abnormal”.

Anyway, digressions aside, pregnancy is something naturally attributed to femininity. There we go, that sounds better. And if this aspect of femininity is disguised, especially deliberately so, in music videos, I think it betrays a certain regression in terms of attitudes to femininity in the media. If the media and the music industry demand that women become infertile, mutated, and alien in order to be successful, are we really living in such an accepting, aware age as we previously thought? I’m not too sure, myself.

Jay-Z cements his status as a legend by interrupting Kanye...

Tue, 03 Jul 2012 12:54:48 +0100

Jay-Z cements his status as a legend by interrupting Kanye West’s acceptance speech for “Video of the Year” at the 2012 BET awards. Emulating his friend’s actions at the 2009 VMA’s, when Kanye rather rubbished Taylor Swift’s big moment, Jay leans in and blusters ”S’cuse me Kanye I’m a let you continue but…” much to the joy of the audience!

Fundamental issues with being a mermaid #18322192: Illiteracy....

Thu, 21 Jun 2012 12:37:17 +0100

Fundamental issues with being a mermaid #18322192:

Illiteracy. Because books don’t like to get wet.

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I’ve just registered for next year’s modules after a...

Thu, 21 Jun 2012 12:33:39 +0100

Sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

I’ve just registered for next year’s modules after a cheeky flit through the rain. Some of them fill me with excitement, others with a bit of reluctant dread: John Milton, for example. Beautiful, fascinating, and extremely rewarding to study, but OH GOD THE READING. So lengthy! So time-consuming! So intense!

But hey, that’s what the summer’s for. Reading, that is. And this summer, just like last summer, and the summer before that: I fully intend to read at least three books from each of my six modules. The only difference being that this summer I will actually do so. Hopefully.

In May, I had a big revision-based panic due to the fact that I hadn’t really read enough of the ‘Renaissance Literature’ set texts. The general idea is that, over the year, you read as many books as you can, and then by the end of the year you’ll be in love with at least three texts and will subsequently be able to blither coherently about them for three hours, under examination. This year, I’d read a handful, but the lightning bolt of literary love had sadly not struck. Thus: panic. And a lot of frantic additional reading.

So as to avoid such eventualities this year, I have the above summer reading plan. At least three texts per module has me covered for the exams, before the year has even begun. This doesn’t mean I won’t go to any lectures or do any other work on other texts, it just means that stress levels will be a wee bit lower in May 2013. Ideally.

Sorry to bore you with this, but I had to rationalise it out in my head. Or, y’know, on paper. Except it isn’t even on paper. It’s on a computer. Either way, you see my point. Public rationalisation is useful, even if the public doesn’t really giveashit. Good.

If you actually do giveashit, below is a list of the modules I’m taking this year. But, again, this is mostly so I can remember what module’s I’m doing, and less for your benefit. Soz.

1) Dissertation

2) Literature of the Romantic Period

3) Chaucer

4) American Fiction

5) Restoration and Eighteenth-Century Literature

6) John Milton

Keira Knightley looking like she’s just fluttered out of...

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 12:12:28 +0100

Keira Knightley looking like she’s just fluttered out of ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’ at the première of new film Seeking a Friend for the End of the World. Lovely!

As my laptop died recently, I’ve been really missing my...

Tue, 05 Jun 2012 23:02:00 +0100

As my laptop died recently, I’ve been really missing my music collection. Though it’s all (thankfully) backed up, the external hard drive is at home, so, essentially, I’ve been relying on Spotify for the last few weeks.

And actually, it’s been great! Despite the adverts, gone is the post-purchase guilt after buying far too much music, gone is the post-purchase guilt after buying anything by One Direction, and gone is the…whatever. Any purchase-related guilt is gone. Because there is no purchasing. You see? It’s brilliant!

I’ve particularly enjoyed indulging in Alan Menken’s beautiful scores from some of my favourite Disney films. I’d already downloaded the key songs on iTunes, however the wordless pieces from the soundtracks available on Spotify came in extremely handy during periods of revision! Song lyrics and lyrical poetry don’t tend to get on very well. And yet a lyric-free piece can convey a story just as easily as words can. Listening to the score from Hercules, I really felt like I was watching the film, which was wonderful. If a little bit distracting.

So far, I’ve compiled a “Disney” playlist full of Menken’s music for Beauty and the Beast, Hercules, Aladdin, Pocahontas, Tangled, and…er…Enchanted. With the welcome additions of Jerry Goldsmith’s music from Mulan, Hans Zimmer’s wondrous sections for The Lion King, and George Bruns’ from 101 Dalmatians, The Jungle Book, and Sleeping Beauty (that scene where Maleficent entrances Aurora and convinces her to touch the spindle…spine-tingling!).

If you haven’t downloaded these tracks yet, you must. Really. Do it.

I am aware that I have slightly overused italics in this post. But that is due to the sheer passion which this music inspires. So there. If you’re a Disney fan, this nostalgia is certainly worth buying into. Or at least, Spotifying into!

Women greet a nice sheepy in Denbighshire, Wales. Again, from...

Sat, 02 Jun 2012 11:48:01 +0100

Women greet a nice sheepy in Denbighshire, Wales. Again, from the 1950’s.

A little girl at the zoo in the early 1950’s.

Sat, 02 Jun 2012 11:42:02 +0100

A little girl at the zoo in the early 1950’s.

Annoyed that you are calling the English "lazy" "greedy" and "a joke".Would you say that about any other ethnicity, and if you did, wouldn't it be racist?

Thu, 31 May 2012 10:49:14 +0100

I think there’s a certain allowance involved if you want to criticise your own ethnicity or nationality - so no, I wouldn’t say that about any other ethnicity. Obviously, I don’t think all English people are benefit scroungers - that would be silly. But I made that comment in response to others who were suggesting that immigrants came over, only to live on benefits and eat up the taxpayer’s money. My point was that, in the vast majority of cases, it is the English who thrive on the benefits provided by our government, not foreigners - as proved by government statistics. Sorry to cause any offence, and thanks for your question!

Yet more property porn: The garden of a house on...

Wed, 30 May 2012 18:03:27 +0100

Yet more property porn:

The garden of a house on Lansdown’s Place West, Bath, UK.

So. Pretty.

This one’s a cheeky £695,000, if you’re interested. Or, y’know, in the market…or something. http://residentialsearch.savills.co.uk/property-detail/302133/list

The bathroom of a house on Gay Street, Bath, UK, which is...

Wed, 30 May 2012 17:57:00 +0100

The bathroom of a house on Gay Street, Bath, UK, which is currently up for sale with Savills Estate Agents.

I have a habit of stalking the UK’s most expensive houses on estate agents’ websites - one cannot help but covet such things.

Anyway, I fell in love with this bathroom on my most recent “session”. It’s gorgeous, isn’t it? I particularly love how the traditional tiles match the underside, if you will, of that lovely roll-top bath. Divine. Oh, and that cheeky chair in the corner is adorable!

And just look at the house. The exterior, that is:

If you have a tidy £1,600,000 lying around, it’s probably yours. With a little help from Bath’s equivalents to Phil and Kirstie.

If, like most of us, you don’t, we can only dream. Or, more accurately, drool.

For more salivate-inducing pictures, see Savills’ website: http://residentialsearch.savills.co.uk/property-detail/279868/list

Daily Mail Readers Never Fail to Astonish Me...

Tue, 29 May 2012 18:05:00 +0100

The Daily Mail website recently published an article relating to Jacqueline Woodhouse, a woman who was arrested and sentenced to 5 months’ imprisonment for a racist tirade on a tube train in London.

You can read the full article here: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2151576/Tube-racist-champagne-fuelled-tirade-viewed-thousands-YouTube-sentenced-months-prison.html

What is truly shocking about this piece, though, is not the content, writing style, or appalling spelling and grammar often common to the DM’s produce, but the readers’ comments beneath it. The worst-rated comment currently sitting at the bottom of the article is as follows: “Good. This sends out a very clear message to all those who think it is ok to spout hatred and racism. It is not.” 238 red arrows. The best-rated comments, meanwhile, mostly object to her being sentenced for something that “she shouldnt have said” but “most of us would love to”.

I couldn’t help putting my “I did a module about the ‘English Language and its History’” two-pence in, and wrote the following:

It is astonishing to me that the highest-rated comments on this article are almost all agreeing with this vile woman’s sentiments. Do none of you realise that the entire British identity and English language was almost completely formed by foreigners? You use French, Germanic, Latin, Celtic, Indian and Scandinavian words every day because our language was formed and added to as we welcomed migrants and colonisers throughout history. Englishness is, in itself, foreign. And, might I add, the vast majority of Jobseeker’s Allowance claimants in the UK are white British by ethnicity, according to government statistics. There are ten white British benefit claimants for every one Black British claimant, and even more for other ethnicities. Get a grip and realise that we white British people are the ones making this country a joke, not the hardworking, legitimate immigrants who come over and do the jobs we are too lazy or greedy to do ourselves.

So far, my comment has been “red-arrowed” twenty-two times.

As said previously: Daily Mail readers never fail to astonish me…

"Weary with toil, I haste me to my bed, The dear repose for limbs with travel tired; But then begins..."

Mon, 21 May 2012 12:52:00 +0100

“Weary with toil, I haste me to my bed,
The dear repose for limbs with travel tired;
But then begins a journey in my head,
To work my mind, when body’s work’s expired:
For then my thoughts, from far where I abide,
Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee,
And keep my drooping eyelids open wide,
Looking on darkness which the blind do see:
Save that my soul’s imaginary sight
Presents thy shadow to my sightless view,
Which, like a jewel hung in ghastly night,
Makes black night beauteous and her old face new.
Lo! thus, by day my limbs, by night my mind,
For thee and for myself no quiet find.”

- Sonnet 27, Billy Shakespeare.

I’m revising Shakespeare’s Sonnets today, if you hadn’t guessed! While popular culture might have it that Sonnet 18 is the most “romantic”, despite the fact that it’s sort of arrogant and praises the poet’s ability more than it glorifies the lover, I find that other sonnets are much…well…cuter. Apologies for the incoherency - I’ll save the proper analysis for my exams!

On my route to my boyfriend’s house, I always walk past a...

Fri, 04 May 2012 14:00:35 +0100

On my route to my boyfriend’s house, I always walk past a garden which houses a lovely big, red, tulip, which pokes through the garden fence onto the path. It always makes me happy, looking at it, and I think that’s because it reminds me of the lovely moist flower from which Thumbelina is born. Granted, that flower isn’t a tulip, but…y’know…the colours are reminiscent!

Here’s a picture from Thumbelina, anyway - I hope you like it as much as I like that tulip. Spring is here!